Our Firsts: The Greatest Thing
by Magma-Dragoon
Summary: Syaoran's inner struggle with his confession dilemma and his subsequent departing: How fair would it be to confess and leave her behind the next day?


Hello!

_This fic is based on nearly all the canons established by the manga up to the last few chapters, with the exception of the date, wich I pulled back a few days. In the manga, they end the story at the beggining of Sakura's fifth grade, here she is about to start fifth grade. You'll find yourself as you read it._

_If you haven't read the manga don't worry, there are no spoilers. The only difference from the anime that is relevant here is that neither Wei nor Mei Ling exist._

**Disclaimer: I do not own CCS. All it's base are belong to CLAMP.**

_Some stuff you should know:_

_Japanese school year starts in April._

_In Japan, names and surnames are inverted, so instead of Sakura Kinomoto you have Kinomoto Sakura._

**Hoe (Pronouced similarly to "Monet", not like "woe".) -** _Sakura's catch phrase... uh, word... whatever! She usually uses it when she's surprised or when she doesn't understands something... you'll get the hang of it as you read._

**chan, san, kun, sama - **_When placed after the name it's a sort of formality to use when addressing someone, -kun is generally for boys, -chan is generally for girls, -san is generally for older people or strangers and -sama is used to refer to someone who's superior to you, it's like a sign of extreme respect and/or devotion._

"Character Talking"

º_Character Thinking_º

(Me Talking)

**Card Captor Sakura: **_The Greatest thing_

April 1st, 1:00 pm.

Through the window of a fast food in Tomoeda, I could see the people walking by without a care in the world. Most of them were youngsters enjoying the last few days of vacation. It was April 1st and classes would start only a couple of days from then. But that was the last thing going through my mind. What really mattered was that April 1st was the day of her birthday.

Kinomoto Sakura, the new mistress of the Clow Cards, just recently turned into Sakura Cards. The girl with the beautiful emerald eyes and chestnut hair. By that time I was already helplessly in love with her. A love which I had refused to accept at first, but as time went by it became too strong to deny. Tomoyo's constant butting in played it's part too.

At the beginning we were actually rivals. It didn't take much time for us to start working together more often than against each other, and before I knew it she was already calling me her friend. Not too long after that, I started falling for her and actually ended up becoming a big friend of hers, which was very unlike me.

The point is, I had been torturing myself for quite sometime by not telling her how I really felt. Not that I hadn't tried, believe me.

For some reason all of my attempts at confessing ended up with someone interrupting me abruptly or some card appearing or some danger threatening the world at the last minute. It only got worse, and when all of the trouble involving the cards was over, I had to go back to Hong Kong, with my love still unconfessed. Needless to say I had been facing some very troubling days.

It was only on that day however that an opportunity showed up. To celebrate Sakura's birthday, we decided to have lunch at this new fast food that had just opened near my house. It was also Eriol's last day in Japan so it was a very special occasion altogether.

When I first arrived at the place none of them were there, but that wasn't much of a surprise, after all I had arrived fifteen minutes earlier than the agreed. That gave me a lot of time to think. It would probably be one of the last times I was going to see her before going back to Hong Kong. I was putting a lot of pressure on myself, wondering whether it was the right thing or not to tell her how I felt now that I was going away. Eventually I decided that I needed something to get my mind off the subject, so I asked for the menu.

After ten minutes of insisting to the waitress that I was waiting for my friends so I could order, Sakura finally came in. Apparently she had already spotted me from the outside cause she didn't even have to look around to find me. She walked straight to the table I had picked for us and took the seat opposite from me, so we were facing each other

I was overwhelmed by the sight of her face, as always. When she gave me one of those flashy smiles I couldn't help but stutter as I tried to speak. "S-Sakura! Hey!" I said, completely lost in her eyes. "Weren't you... uh... coming with Daidouji-san?"

She shook her head. I watched her bangs shaking graciously and found it curious that hers was the only hair that caught my attention when shaking like that. Every single movement of her head came with a beautiful effect of the sun reflecting on the small imperfections of her strands. "Uh? No..." She said, pulling me back to reality. "She and Eriol-kun said they might be a little late. I talked to them on the phone a while ago."

"Oh..." I said, scratching the back of my head.

"Have you been waiting here a while?" She asked with her sincere concern.

"No!" I answered too quickly and loudly, earning some weird looks from the people next to us. Sakura apparently didn't notice.

"Good. I was a little late so I was worried you would get tired of waiting and start eating on your own." She said playfully.

It's important to understand that at the time, the stupor caused by her presence turned all of my concerns into what she thought of me, and as a result I tended to answer things rather quickly and would often sound stupid.

"I'd never do that!" I exclaimed immediately, and a second later I understood the joking tone on her voice. Just as quickly as I had defended myself, I blushed deep red and started looking for words to say. Not that it mattered what words they were, but it felt important to say something. Anything. "I mean... uh..."

The stupor would occasionally result in a loss for words too.

Sakura giggled, like she always did at these situations. "I know." She said smiling. "You're too nice. Sometimes I even feel like I'm not worthy of being your friend, you know?"

That particular answer had been new to me, and once again my heart gave a big leap. "I... Thanks..." Taking a deep breath, I cautiously formed a sentence in my head before saying it. "It's not true. You think I'm nice, but when first I came to Tomoeda I wasn't like this at all." I said, suddenly giving a much more serious mood to the conversation. "I changed a lot because of you and the people here." I was surprised at how easily that had come out, and judging from Sakura's face, so was she. But when I actually realized what I had just said the embarrassment came back. I managed to finish my point, but in a much meeker and shy voice. "I'm the one who doesn't deserve your friendship."

Sakura was looking different now. She was still smiling, but it was a much more meaningful smile, one could tell that she was really flattered. That made me feel good and relax a bit. "Thanks." She said, taking away a more of my embarrassment "We feel pretty much the same about each other don't we? That's probably why we ended up such good friends."

Little did she know how much that comment had hurt me.

"Yeah..." I answered without excitement "The same..." I muttered to myself.

And so we sat there in silence. Sakura took the menu that now rested on the table and started going through it, occasionally making a comment on how delicious a particular flavor of ice-cream was. Incidentally I looked at the empty seat beside me and saw a small wrapping on it. My birthday present to Sakura. Suddenly it came to me that I hadn't even congratulated her yet.

"Shit." I mumbled when I first got a glimpse of the present.

"Huh?" Sakura looked at me curiously. she followed my gaze to the present resting beside me. Her face lit up when she saw the little wrapping. "Ooh! Is that for me?" She asked with excitement.

I sighed. º_Good going Syaoran. You have a deep talk about friendship but forget the very reason you're here in the first place._º I told myself. Of course, it was too late to mourn. I had to fix my mistake. "Yeah!" I said, taking the present in my hands. "Here, happy birthday!"

As it was to be expected, Sakura didn't mind me taking so long to give her the present or congratulate her. She was so understanding it hurt. Fortunately I didn't have much time to feel bad about it, as I was now worried about my gift. Would she like it? She would surely say she did, but that'd be because she's nice to everyone. Would she really like it?

She ripped the paper to reveal a little cardboard box. Opening the box she found my two gifts. The first gift she saw was the big one. It was a framed photograph taken on a rare occasion when everybody had met at the Tsukimine shrine for the new year festival. There was me, herself, Tomoyo, Kero faking a doll position, her brother and father, Eriol and Yukito. All of us smiling, for it had been a great day. I had decided to give her that at the last minute. Maybe I was afraid she'd forget my face.

It was joyful seeing her smile as she looked at the picture. There wasn't any doubt she had loved it. She looked up at me. "Thank you!" She said, in a tone that meant a whole lot more than just those two words.

I blushed once more, but this time I was satisfied with myself. "There's one more thing inside." I pointed out.

"Hoe?" Sakura looked back inside the box and took out my other present. It was a rustic bracelet, hand-made with golden strands. The strands were carefully locked in different shaped patterns and at each tip they were loose so one could tie them around the wrist.. She admired it for a while, turning it to see the light reflect in different angles. "It's beautiful!" She said, dazed by the lights.

"I... I made it." I said, trying to sound casual. "They say it brings good fortune to wear things that were hand-made for you. It has more... meaning in it."

Sakura observed the intricate reflexes on the surface of the stands once more, smiling inwardly. "I really loved it." She said. "Thank you!"

And once more I was dazzled by the power of simple words combined with a sincere smile. I watched as she tried to tie the strands so they would stay around her wrist, failing miserably at the task, causing me to chuckle at the cute frown on her face.

"Could you help me?" She asked, extending her left wrist and handing the bracelet to me. I promptly took it and proceeded to tie it around her soft skin. I carefully binded the loose golden strings, making sure twice that it would stay in it's place.

Then, as I was pulling my hands back a sudden urge came to me. Due to my instinct alone, I took her hand in mine. I was holding it the way a gentleman holds a hand he's about to kiss, and I must admit, the thought did cross my mind. As I enveloped her small, delicate hand, I noticed every single detail about it, from it's smoothness to it's warmth. It was only a whole second later that I actually acknowledged my action, and it was definitely a tremendous shock to see my hand around Sakura's and her eyes looking at me with confusion, but the really amazing thing is, when I came to me, I didn't let go. Much to the contrary, I put my other hand around hers too.

"Syaoran-kun..." Sakura was as lost as I was. Maybe it was because of my complete bewilderment, or the million thought's rushing through my head, but from my point of view, her face was blank. Whatever she was thinking at the moment was completely surrounded by a deep fog in her eyes. But she wasn't pulling her hand back, and it felt so good to hold it like that I thought I could never possibly let go.

The more I desperately tried to think of what to do the more I stopped acting with my mind and started acting with my instinct. After all, I had been holding her hand for about fifteen seconds and we were just staring at each other silently. Before I knew it, the words started coming out of my mouth.

"Sakura... I..." And that point, every doubt I had about confessing or not had vanished. It seemed like the only possible choice, telling her how I felt. Still, when the waitress interrupted us abruptly, it was somewhat a relief.

"Excuse me, would you like to order now?" She asked, completely indifferent to the moment.

My first reaction was to pull back my hands, as if Sakura suddenly had an electric current going through her, then without looking back at her, I turned to the woman. My heart was racing like crazy and I was actually panting from her surprise appearance. "Hum... no thanks." I said. "We've still got more friends coming up."

"Oh." The waitress said, and without saying another word she left. She was probably tired of me telling her that already.

The moment we were left alone again a weird mood took hold of us. Sakura was looking at me with a shy curiosity, her face getting red. I had absolutely no idea of what to do. All of the things I had just done seemed like some kind of trance I was in, and then, when it was all over, I couldn't rely on my instincts anymore.

We didn't talk much after that. Sakura actually tried to start a conversation, but it didn't work that well.

"I really liked your gifts..." She said meekly. "Thanks."

I forced a smile. "You're welcome." Was all I said, and then we fell back in silence.

As we stood there, occasionally sharing glances but always looking away quickly whenever our eyes met, I started to get a terrible feeling that we were at that precise moment growing distant. I had never seen Sakura acting that way, so it's understandable that she felt like a stranger to me. Then I started wondering if that wasn't what she thought when I took her hand too. Was she as scared as I was?

º_What is she thinking? Did she understand why I did that? She certainly was affected by it. Did she feel betrayed? Did I betray our friendship?_º I asked myself, among many other questions.

I'm not quite sure how long it was, but it seemed like an eternity. The point is, after much discomfort, Tomoyo and Eriol finally arrived. Though I wasn't quite sure if they were the exact or last thing I needed at the moment.

I have to admit I don't recall much of what happened when they came. My mind was far away, thinking about her. I remember that I would look around me and everything seemed blurry except for her. It was like she was shinning a light so focused that it didn't even reflect on the objects around her. It belonged to her and her alone.

Tomoyo and Eriol, as always, were quick to catch on our strange behavior and, as it is in their nature, they had to butt in again. Curiously, it was only when Tomoyo called Sakura to talk privately that I really took notice of their presence.

Until that moment my responses had all been reflexes of some sort. Eriol wasn't wasting any time either, he started his game as soon as the girls had left the table.

"It's really a shame isn't it?" He said. "Both of us have to go back to our homes and leave Sakura-san behind, by herself."

I snorted, like I always did whenever he opened his mouth. Though now that I knew I was facing the very reincarnation of Clow, the snort was rather weak and hesitating. "She's got plenty of friends... It's not like she'll be lonely."

And he chuckled in response, like he always did. "But Sakura-san holds a special place in her heart for each one of us, and that place will miss both you and me very dearly."

There's something about us people that doesn't let us believe some things fully until we've heard it from someone else's mouth, and when we finally do, we are suddenly too eager to believe it. When he said those words, something inside me jumped. I think it was the first time I imagined Sakura missing me rather than I missing her. To my surprise, I found Eriol was right.

"She doesn't like me the way I like her. It would only be painful for both of us." I said.

"I'll give you just one more advice, and then I promise you, the choice will be all yours." He started, using his wise man voice again. "Sakura loves you. If you confess and find out she loves you just like a friend you might be sad for quite some time, but, if you don't confess, trust me, you may regret it till the end of your life." He said. "And if it's Sakura you're worried about, the worst thing you can do to her is try to protect her from the truth. The sooner you tell her the more she will trust you afterwards."

Truth be told, whenever Eriol said something, everybody should listen. His detestable character contrasts perfectly with his ever so great knowledge of the ways of the heart. I felt in obligation to answer his advice with a sarcastic comment, but I was rendered incapable. I just couldn't help but agreeing with him.

Tomoyo and Sakura came back. Sakura took the seat across from me again and Tomoyo sat beside her. Her face looked brighter now. Whatever Tomoyo had said had done her good.

Once again the waitress came and this time we were finally ready to order.

Just like any other day I didn't speak much through the meal. I limited myself to watch Sakura. As we ate through our food I felt more and more relaxed watching her smile normally again. º_Maybe it wasn't that big a deal._º I wondered.

Nothing too special happened through the meal. We talked about future plans, though I avoided saying much about my future, careful not to tell anyone that I had to go back home. It was still a secret from Sakura and Tomoyo, and I wasn't just about ready to tell them yet.

After eating and paying the bill we all walked outside the fast food, ready to say our goodbyes. Sakura cheerfully thanked us all for the gifts. Too bad I wasn't paying much attention when she got Eriol's and Tomoyo's, so I can't really remember what they gave her.

A nice moment of silence was shared among us. For a few seconds we just stood there enjoying each other's company, each of us with their own thoughts and concerns, but all of us knowing that what we had there was truly friendship. And though it may seem off context with the focus of this story to say all that, I thought it was worth mentioning, cause it was on those few seconds that I reflected on Eriol's words, and it was only that friendly aura that made me relax to a point were I could take a decision, confidently and carefree.

"Do you mind if I walk you home, Sakura?" I asked her casually. That wasn't anything weird at all. Many times in the past I had done that, either because she needed company or because we were just enjoying a nice conversation. This time however she reacted differently, which proved that she was still bothered by the hand incident.

Her first reaction was to gasp, then blush, and finally answer hesitatingly. "But your house is right here. I wouldn't want to get you so off your way." She nervously protested.

My way home was of extremely low importance to me at that moment. "It's no problem, really."

After hesitating a bit more she answered. "Alright... I appreciate it." She said, and a private wave of happiness filled me. The kind that only someone who loves can understand.

I ignored Tomoyo's and Eriol's giggles and chuckles. Sakura did the same. Either that or she was really oblivious to it.

"We go opposite sides, so bye." Eriol said. "I'll see you tomorrow at the airport."

Sakura and I waved our hands to the boy. Next time we saw him was going to be the definitive goodbye, and that's another feeling one can't easily understand without going through. It really does feel like someone's taking a part of you.

Tomoyo also took a different path than ours. "Bye!" We all said, this time more casually.

Sakura and I watched Tomoyo walk away until she was out of sight, then, as we briefly exchanged glances, I forgot all about goodbyes or hand incidents. My mind was set only on the close future.

I was in some new sort of stupor, knowing that I had just taken a huge decision from which I was positive that there was no turning back. It seemed like a dream, where everything works differently. The way she looked, the way I talked and even the way I felt. I think the simplest way to describe the world to me then is to say that my head was in the clouds. Still, despite all of that dreamy feeling, my heart had started racing.

"Shall we go?" She asked, a tired smile on her face. I nodded in agreement and soon we were walking side by side.

As we walked in silence I could visualize the moment getting closer. It was like having your body dragged down a pit by a power so strong you can't fight back. But this was a pit I had willingly plunged into.

Curiously, Sakura was the one to give me the final push. "Do you think we'll be in the same classroom again this year?" She asked out of the blue.

I stopped short, and Sakura followed suit. "I... there's something we should talk about."

It was at that moment that the dream part ended and reality sank in. Sakura looked at me with scared eyes. Of course, judging from my tone and my face, I definitely didn't have good news. My heart sank when I realized that after I said what I had to say our problems wouldn't be solved. As a matter of fact we would both probably end our days feeling like trash. Was it fair to hurt her with the truth like that?

"The worst thing I can do to you is protect you from the truth." I said, almost unconsciously.

If it wasn't for Eriol's words coming back to me at that moment I would have probably given up and ran back home. But I stayed, for me and for her.

Sakura on the other hand, became even more nervous when I told her that. "What's wrong Syaoran-kun?" She asked, innocently concerned.

And out came those three words that have been longed for by so many people. It didn't sound pretty or romantic. It was like a quick, unsteady war-shout actually. Sakura even took a step back, not from the content in my words, but from the loudness and harshness I had used to pronounce them.

"Not just like a friend." I continued, to make sure she'd understand me. "I am in love with you." This time it came out meek and shy in contrast with the other one. I tried to smile, but I just couldn't control my face. It was steady at a nervous frown.

Sakura was absolutely shocked. Nothing could have prepared her for that, I guess. The first recognizable feeling on her face, after the shock, was doubt. She didn't know what to do or to say. Fortunately, after the hard part had gone by I suddenly felt a lot more confident.

"You don't have to answer me now." I said, finally managing to smile. "Take your time to reflect on your own feelings and don't hesitate to say the truth when you've found it. That's all I ask."

Her eyes were almost ethereal. She didn't look like she was going to cry nor smile. Even so, what she did next was way more unpredictable than I could have ever expected.

She took two steps forward and, without previous warning, kissed me right on the lips. For no more than five seconds our lips touched. As they slowly parted I could only think how much I wanted it to last longer..

When I could see Sakura's face again I recognized a smile on it. I was back in dreamland.

"I... I'm sorry for doing that." She said, blushing cutely.

I brought my hand to my lips, softly touching them. "No... it was..." º_Fantastic, superb, dreamlike, paradise._º "I don't mind... Does that mean you..."

Sakura sighed. "I don't know..." She said, still smiling. "I'm actually very confused."

I was also very confused. Why was she smiling like that then? Why did she kiss me? "I don't understand."

Sakura took a deep breath. "All I know is that when you said... that, I knew that I didn't have to be afraid. Because it was Syaoran-kun." She started. "I like you too much, and though I had never thought of you like that before, I wasn't scared, cause I saw in your eyes that you were still with me."

That was quite a knife in the chest. She had never thought of me like that, so she would probably dismiss me nicely like I thought she would. But what was the kiss all about? Was there still hope for me? "I'm sorry..." I said. "I still don't get it. Why did you..."

Sakura somehow, still sported a smile, which was great. Whatever she was thinking, she was happy that I confessed. "I don't

know how to explain." She said. "I got kinda lost in the moment, and I just felt like... you know..."

I smiled unconsciously. "And what about know? What are you feeling now?" º_Straight to the point._º I told myself.

"I'm not sure..." She answered. Quite an unsatisfying answer, but I couldn't blame her.

How I wanted to take her and kiss her again, but things were going so well, that I felt any wrong move would shatter the moment in pieces.

Sakura started talking again. "Syaoran-kun... can I ask you a favor?"

I woke up from yet another daze. "Huh? Sure... anything." I answered quickly.

Sakura giggled, probably at my eagerness to answer her request, but as she started talking she gained a more serious tone. "I think I'm starting to think straight now so, I don't want to do anything stupid. I really don't!" She said, starting to get emotional. "I wish I could be as calm as Yukito-san when I confessed, and say something now that would make both of us feel good and solve our problems... but the truth is, I've got no idea what to do now." Apparently, she had started to think about the consequences of that conversation, cause her smile had already vanished and given place to a concerned face.

I tried to do my best to make her feel alright. "It's ok. I'm not sure how this works either..." I said, trying to ease the mood a bit.

Sakura smiled for a second, to thank my effort, but went immediately back to her thoughtful expression. "I'm really happy that you've told me your feelings... You have no idea how flattered I am. Still, I don't know my answer yet..." She suddenly jerked herself towards me, so our faces were just a couple of inches away. Her beautiful eyes were staring at me so deeply I almost forgot to listen to her words. "That's why... I wanted to ask you to give me time."

She stood there, staring at me. I wasn't sure if she was waiting for me to answer of if she was just as lost in the moment as I was. Either way, I had to fight myself not to kiss her again. I had to respect her feelings, and if she thought she needed time I wouldn't force myself.

Finally she pulled back. I found out, in the form of a loud sigh, that I had been holding my breath for quite a while. "I know it's not fair with you..." She said, and that made my heart melt at the amount of concern she would put in me even at such a time. "But please. We like each other so much... I don't want to ruin it." She was also moved by the moment. Her face was all red, and she was shifting nervously all the time.

I nodded. She was right after all. "Agreed..." I said, doing my best to smile truthfully. "So don't worry... whatever happens, I promise we'll always be friends."

Sakura looked at me in the eye again, I could see a few tears had started forming, but she was smiling again. She rose her right hand and lifted her pinky finger, like she had done before whenever we made a promise. "It's a promise then." She said.

I put my pinky around hers, and we made a swift shake to symbolize the pact. "Promise." I reassured her.

When we disconnected our fingers silence took in again. We just stared at each other, wondering if things were really going to remain the same. Was that even a good thing?

I was taken by surprise when Sakura jumped forward and put her arms around me. She buried her face in my chest, her grip on me was astoundingly tight. It felt magnificent, but I didn't know how to react at the first few seconds.

"Thank you." She whispered to me, her face still leaned against me. "You really are the best Syaoran-kun."

I couldn't tell if she was crying, but I was pretty sure she wasn't. It was more of an affectionate hug. Feeling that it was the right thing to do, I hugged her back. What a torture it was not being allowed to lift her head and kiss her again.

I don't think she had thought of that when she hugged me, after all, she meant well.

Eventually the hug ended, and we were left eye to eye again, for another long time of staring back and forth.

"So..." Sakura started, after much unspoken conversation. "We should get going." She said.

I agreed. "Yeah... come on, I'm still walking you home." º_Home!_º It suddenly hit me, sending me right out of dreamland again. I still had to tell her I was going back home. Would she take that as well as she had with my confession? Would I take it as well?

We walked side by side in silence, as I pondered on that dreadful, but inevitable moment. It had the potential to render all of our previous conversation pointless. After all, I wasn't sure if I would be able to come back in a month or only in twenty years.

Finally we arrived at her front door. The cherry trees around us made the place look like a movie set. Indeed, my problems would probably make a good plot for a romantic movie.

Sakura stood at the threshold, facing me. "Thanks for walking me home." She said in a timid voice.

I smiled at her shyness. After I confessed our roles had inverted. She suddenly became the shy one and I started feeling more and more confident. "Don't worry..." I answered absentmindedly. My mind still thinking that was my last chance to say what I had to say.

"Bye bye." She said, turning her back and reaching for the doorknob.

"Wait!" I cried instinctively.

She turned around, still with her shy smile on. "What is it?" She asked.

I froze. Somehow that was harder than confessing my feelings. "I..." I took a deep breath. "Sakura, I'm sorry, there's something..."

Before I could finish, a pink petal fell from the cherry tree, brushing against Sakura's nose, causing her to sneeze.

I chuckled at the cute scene, and Sakura giggled in response. For some reason, seeing her laugh like that made me chuckle even harder, and she followed suit. Before I knew it, we were both drowning in our own laughter.

I don't know how long we stayed there, just laughing at that silly moment, but it felt so good. Like a last breath of fresh air before plunging into a dark pit. I enjoyed those moments with all the intensity I could, cause I knew they would be over soon.

As the laughs started to die out, my mind started working on the appropriate words to tell her with the least amount of shock. However, upon looking at her laughing face, I just couldn't think straight.

Sakura was still wiping a tear from her watered eye when she said it. "You know... Even though we've still got a lot of ground to go together, I think what you said to me back there was the greatest gift I could ask for." She grinned. "Thanks for being Syaoran-kun!"

When you love someone, you are filled with something that makes the whole world seem more intense. Pain and pleasure, sadness and joy. We live our lives to the fullest only when we are able to love. Still, we think of others before ourselves. All you want is for the one you love most to be happy, even if it means you'll cry or suffer, and there's no need for a reason. When you love, you just know that's what you want and you dive blindly into anything to make that person happy.

This irrational devotion can lead to disastrous outcomes. Once you find that you've done something that might hurt your loved one, a pain starts growing in your heart and it haunts you in whatever you do. You see yourself trapped in a cage of guilt, doing your best to run from your mistake, when sometimes it would be best to just face it.

As I stared into Sakura's eyes, I knew that today had gone surprisingly well, but in the future there would still be suffering for both of us. I could have kept the pain for myself, but I told her my secret instead, and now, when everything looked up to a happy ending I would break the harmony we had found.

Was keeping the truth from her any worse than bringing her so much complications? It didn't mater anymore. There was no way out. I had to go back to Hong Kong, and I had already brought our relationship to a new, unstable stage. And now, after she had been so strong, I was about to turn my back on her and go away. It was like asking her to fight by my side and leaving her to fight by herself as soon as the fight started.

And so, I didn't have the heart to tell her. I said a quick goodbye, making sure to keep smiling, and walked away, not looking back. Not even once. I ran away, I was sure I'd never have the courage to look at her face again.

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**A/N: **_There you go. Sorry, if you were expecting a little more... events. It really is focused on Syaoran's thoughts on everything, so it might have gotten tiring to some. Yes, this is the end. What happened after is not the point of the story. The conclusion itself is Syaoran not telling Sakura the truth. That's the point._

_This story is part of the "Our Firsts" series. It comprises only one-shots, all based on all the canon from the anime or the manga, whichever I find more conveninent. They all suggest how Sakura and Syaoran would actually handle real life situations that every couple may go through, all of that in Syaoran's point of view. They are_** NOT **_part of the same story and/or time line. Just because one thing happened at one story it doesn't mean it will have happened at the other. The only thing binding them in the same series is the theme. They are part of the same series but not the same story. I won't be posting new stories under "The Greatest Thing", each one-shot will have a different title and a different fiction post.  If you enjoyed this one you might want to read the rest of the series, check out my profil for them. It has no definitive end, so sooner or latter something new might pop up._

_Thank you and goodbye! And do review, there's no point in not reviewing really, even if you think it sucks._


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